thinkthink

theres a lotta things going in circles in my head lately..

sometimes i feel really frustrated and agitated. but i cant do anything about it cus its totally outta my hands. its so bloody annoying. half the time i feel like venting it out over the net and hope that that person actually reads it and actually gets a piece of my mind..

'understand this bitch!'

but im more matured than that. somethings are better left unsaid and kept to oneself. i wouldnt wanna start some lame ass net war or sumshit like that. thats just plain jerkoff man.

non the less. its shitty, when people dont understand u. but being pretentious bastards that they are, they still act like they do. hah!. fuck off u twat. u kno nothing abt me.

i contemplate of the pro's and cons .. the yes and no's endlessly at night .. till there was actually a moment of silence which my brain stopped for a bit. and my mind was blank. at that moment i know i've done something weird, yet interesting.

'i mindfucked myself'

okay.. weird.

anyhows, updates of life;

i've begun to slowly pay off and fill up all the forms needed to fly away from this place. i feel shitty sometimes. then i think again, i shouldnt be feeling this shitty, cus the reason why i felt shitty wasnt gonna feel shitty for me when i'm gone. so i stop feeling like shit.

numsayin?

tapping numbers into the calculator sent shivers down my spine .. cus the actually cost looked so huge. i know my ass is sold, if i fucked myself there .. i wont comeback for sure. well not till i find money to pay back ..

i tried finding peace in reading,but the books i have seem to be filled with too much nuisance.. the rambling never stops. interesting it is, but there are just times when u feel like 'fucking hell just tell me and stop humping my leg already'.

cant be arsed to upload pictures. cus i aint a chick, got a problem with that? fuck off! this aint a bimbo blog.

my hair's short now. cus i look like a pansy in photo's. i got other reasons too.. but why the fuck should i tell u..

think thats all for now.. more cursing and flaunting of badwords later.

cheers.