oh rainie day~!

havent you guys noticed? its been raining almost everyday lately. especially in the afternoon, thus meaning excellent weather to stay in bed. haha. not to sound pussy-ish, but sometimes dont you just feel weird that sometimes its like the weather knows how ur feeling .. other than the fucked up incident o my phone gettin lost, i've been swamped with work and fuck load o stress, then it rains. coincidentally, as if god knows that i'm feeling blueeeeee-eyy.

kehkahkah. lame as punk. anyways, couple o times i'd have to walk in the rain to do my errands in the evening and while it drizzled. i looked up.

'.. tiny tiny droplets of rain, falling from the sky to the earth. touching my face as i looked above. refreshed, relieved..'

for 5 seconds, it felt as though all the burden upon me was lifted. sounds gay rite? haha. non the ness. that 5 seconds of freedom felt good. things just keep on coming up lately, cursing that when it did came, its as though someone opened the floodgates of stress. bastards.

-

i browsed my bank accounts. suprisingly, i managed to collect the target amount. alas, since i have no hp. thus i gotta save more to get me one, + money for projects and outings. aieee. just when i was about to get me self a new wallet with the extra cash.

i would of been a happy wank by this week if i didnt lost my hp.

-

watched 'sepet' yesterday. lots o high and low comments from people all over. most of my chinese friends said the show was awesome, while my malay friends kinda preferred something else.

it was good. but i'd prefered it slightly differently, still it was good.

it showed malaysia as a multicultureed/raced nation. backgrounds of not so wealthy malays and chinese. the love affair, well it was a wee bit sappy, but i'd give it a 6 outta 10. roles were taken by non actors, thus some of the scene's were abit rigid. the script was funny. i was laughing hysterically with my friend at 1am.

'panggil saya Jason..' (real name was actually Lee *something* Loong)
'*sarcastic remark* oh ada nama london' (translated: 'oh, so you DO have an english name')

haha. good stuff.

-

thats all for now, kinda lazy to express my grudge and angst feeling on the thief. im sure you guys are just too lazy to read about that .. so laters..

messed

its almost 2 days since my phone got stolen. ironically, it feels as though i just lost a girlfriend instead of a handphone. heh. ya know, the feeling of insecurity, unsure of what to do, dont know who to talk to, wanting to go out but unable to do so, eating disorder, excessive sleeping.

aihh.. the fucked up feeling.

it may sound like i'm overreacting, but the truth is that i worked my ass off for that phone. planned to used that phone till i left for the uk which is like another 1 year and 5 months time. i bought a new 256mb mmc card for it, took fuck load of pictures and video's of close friends and family. some note for my project was on that phone, so was all the reminders. last but not least, all the phone numbers.

not only some of em are really hard to contact but aihh.

i dont need this stress.

worst of, i dont have money to actually buy a new phone. heck i'm even lacking in some cash for my trip to the uk. my parents dont have money since my house is currently under renovation, plus their gonna pay half for my trip also. so i dont wanna trouble them with more financial burden.

i know a couple o friends who are willing to borrow their spare phones to me, but the undeniable fact that i was robbed by my own friend has left me feeling a bit insecure. obviously i cant afford to lose their phones too. thus, worst off. i guess i'll be without a phone until july. when i come back from the uk.

so guys, if any o u have problem's contacting me well er.. dial my house phone and leave a msg alrite. if not mail me o something ..

tis a fucked up week.

i curse thou thief to die an agonizing death, cut off thou fingers, rip off thou limbs and pour acid on thou face. i will show u no remorse when i find you. your family, friends and everyone you ever loved will know of your doing. you wretcherd backstabbing rodent.

hatefully yours,

suffieaee.

i lost my hp!

fucked. screwed.

fucked and screwed.

yep.

i lost my phone. my baby 6600 which i just bought like 4 fucking months ago. i paid cash for it, cash which it took me ages to collect. hard earned, worked my ass off, not to mention starving for a couple o days just to buy that phone.

this morning, happily. some idiot stole it.

heh. this idiot also happens to be friend. though i've yet to find out who, with time i am fucking sure to know it is eventually. when that time comes. aihhh..

fucker.

make matters worst ey, this evening i went to play some footie. halfway through making a fool outta myself and chasing my friend, i kinda rolled over the floor. which was a bad thing to do. cause next thing i know, i'm itching all over. first i thought it was some kind of allergy o something. cause i ate prawns earlier. but after 3 hours a wee bit too late for the effect to take place innit?

thus, i was scratching and trying not to look swollen all over. face included. sheesh! could the day get any worst than that.

bad mouth i had. my cousin held a small bbq later, which luckily by then the allergy went off. but i still itched a bit. aih. crappy day. i was forced by my cousin to invite some friends, which i think went off badly sounding like i was a desperate fuck looking for females.

they didnt turn up in the end. some bad some good in that.

the bbq was good. small group, enjoyable non the less. i ate so many chicken wings, if it was possible i think i'd grow wings by tomorrow. hah!

-

off to bed.

weekend part 2; f1

still cant believe i fucking went for prodigy. fuck yea!

prodigy : done!

yep yep. thats one for my list of 'to do before dying'. hoorah!

-

f1.

sleeping at 6.30am didnt help much to the fact that i was suppose to leave the house at 10am. fatigued from the party last night, my dad shook me up and i went for a long bath to actually wake up.

the actual race starts at 3pm. 2nd qualifying round starts at 12pm. the 1st qualifying showed fucking good performance by the renault team. alonso first, truli second, fisichella third. the new renault car was fucking fast. if im not mistaken, the changed the gspot of the car. centre gravity la perverts. g spot was moved more to the back, thus giving it more power coming out from the corners. the downside was the driver oversteers. alonso didnt seem to have much problem with that.

my cousin picked me up, then we(me, my cousin and a friend) started our way. not to sepang, but to look for a car wash. haha. after the car looked flashy, we were officially off to sepang. had a quick bite at dengkil. hungry bunch.

this year, the traffic was soo much at ease compared to last years. ironically, we actually wanted the traffic jam. why? because we had the biggest fucking ferrari flag and we let it ride in the wind. okay perhaps there wasnt any wind, but fuck we wanted the attention and we sure got it alrite. ;P

there was this line o buses. factory buses to be precise, it was filled with bar-honda fans. which from the looks of it. i think they got the tickets for free, workers perhaps? well being all fanatic and shite. when we passed by the bus, some of em made faces, some shook their heads in disgust at our ferrari flag, while others were more blunt by showing us 'the finger'. being good sportsman we are. we just moved on, smiling away with our so called ferrari pride. pfft. as if i give a rats ass abt ferrari.


the mall.

we went straight to the mall area upon reaching the circuit. with the ferrari flag riding the winds high above us, we sure as hell looked like a bunch o ferrari fanatics. which we obviously arent, all of us got the shirts for free. including flag. haha.

so the mall was packed with foreigners and also locals. we walked around looking for anyone familiar. nope, no one. heh. not suprising. so we decided to loiter around just to kill time. suddenly outta no where appears this women.

tied back, long brown hair with a wee bit o blonde streaks, posh spice gucci sunglasses, a renault shirt button only halfway down, white tube inside, white mini skirts, heels. we nicked her posh.

i stared at awe at her while she talked to her friends. gees, that has got to be the most hawttest gal in here. i dont actually know what exactly, but her style was just ... hawt. she defineatly reminded me of posh spice. whom i absolutely adore for her sexy sexy style.

if she took off the shades, she'd look like an oriental version of posh. well, hopefully her eyes werent that small. if it was, that'll totally put me off. imagine, as hawt as posh but has 2 lines as eyes. wattafuck. oh well.

aiesh. counting my luck on meeting a girl who dresses as hawt as that. bleh. wont happen.

sidenote: this is the second time i'm seeing fucking hawt 'renault' girls. last year i saw this uberly hawt model like girl wearin a renault shirt. i's thinking of buying a renault shirt fo next year. ;P bwahhaha.

the race.

we went separate ways when the race started, my cousin had to sit at topaz(tower stand) to entertain his dad and clients, while me and my other friend left for hill E. which was like a fucking 20 minutes walk. fuck that hill was fucking far, the humidity wasnt helping either.

well, we still manage to reach the gate without dying of thirst. the hill side as usuall packed. this time we had good view, 2 corners actually. petronas corner and the final u turn before the finish line. heh. like previous years, the ferrari flag was up. was the biggest and only ferrari flag on that hill. muahaha.

when the race started, things gotten a wee boring. you could see how bloody fucked up was the haze in malaysia, with the sun still right on top of our heads. we prayed for less sun burns than last years.

bar-honda's driver jensen button only managed to make 5 laps before his engine burnt at our corner. we jumped for joy as accidents are always fun to watch up close. alonso lead the race till the finish. fisichella collided with another driver and was off the race. boooohooo.

yada yada yada. the race ended, alonso first. cant remember who 2nd and 3rd. ;P

we did a wee bit of camwhoring, but mostly candid video action on anonymous girls around. ahaks.

went back to the mall to meet with my cousin, gees i tell ya the calories i burnt just from walking to and fro to the mall. aieee.. not to mention fucking hot sun. by lucky charms, once again we managed to see 'posh' there. video'd her a wee bit. then was off to our cars. our feet hurt so bad, our armpits were like puddles of sweat and we got darker.

slowly drove outta the parking lot an into the main road, which was jam packed. i was topless for 10 minutes, but decided to put my shirt back on. the thought of girls staring at sweaty topless guys in the backseat.. weell.. noot good if u got flabs like i do. heh.

going back home, we made some new acquaintance on the way back. ahaks. instead of going back home, we went to hartamas square to get to know our new friends.

feeling absolutely fucked all over because of the long long hot day, we left hartamas for home.

weekend. education uk. prodigy

well. the previous weekend was such a bomb to end ones holiday. i was totally fucked by monday morning to actually go back to college. which i ended up skipping my last class cause o migrain. guess this might be how you drunkards feel after late night partyaeing o sumthing ey. bleh.

education yewww kayy.
longing for more freedom and to stay oversea's, i've been researching and picking out universities which i hope to get into when i'll be doing my degree. UK was the destination. nation of football, lame hooligans and excessive partying. heh, dream come true perhaps. so i was off to PWTC in hopes for good news and great news for next year.

reaching there, i looked around and took note of which universities i wished to visit first. so being the ignorant and snobbish brat that i am, i went to Southampton University first. which ruined my whole day. the first talker was a nice chap, giving me a brief explanation of Soton U and its merits. which i told him that i've already e-mailed them earlier on just to show that i was serious about them. he then asked me to talk to this other lad which also happens to be the Administrations dude for the Uni.

first i thought, this guys just old. he aint snobbish, though to actually talk to an english who's snobbish. whooptidoo. i feel like im in england already! nevertheless, he explained while i asked, then came to the point that he asked me for my GPA. well to be frank my GPA is shite. just an average student i's be.

when he heard my GPA, his eyebrow rose a bit and suddenly he was yappin about how Soton U actually disencourage students with diploma's joining em.

with heavy english accent
'.. well actually ya see, we at southampton university dont actually encourage diploma students to go for our courses.. tis because we feel that diploma students are more practical and..(dunno wtf wtf) .. obviously mathematics is the core of engineering.. (zzzzp cutting short his yappin) we would reccomend students of 3.4 and above to join us..'

.......

blooody fucking hell. 3.4 ? gees! by this time i was putting a 'im okay, smile for the dude face. think happy thoughts' expression.

so alrite, they are the fucking no 1 in the UK. fine, my bad for having such high hopes. bahhhH! arghhh!

*chomp*

*grunt *

*shriek!*

morality = -75% the only way for me to actually be happy again was to get a free blowjob. which obviously cant bloody happen ere. bah! so i left feeling literally shit.

-

pro-fucking-digy.

saturday night has to be the most event filled night. the number of gigs around, raves, heck parties were everywhere. so where be suffieaee at this time ya ask.

i's was at Menara KL enjoying Prodigy.

it was pretty wicked, though to be frank the only thing good shite that night was prodigy. everything else was a whore. well sucky.

first of all, this was the first event ever to actually have like soldier or guards to actually body check you and shit. they even had metal detectors. which i thought was a wee too hasty, we came to party man. not to hijack a plane. non the less. the set up of the stage was awesome, but i would of not put a podium right in front of the stage as it blocked us from seeing prodigy.

we were expecting a small no of people coming cause regenerate was on the same time and day. which meant all the shufflers from all ovah malaysia would be there. thus meaning we'd have prodigy to ourselves. muahhaha. but to my suprise the no of people who turned up was good. to make things better, that night was probably the time i partied with most white people. heh, feel a bit like the yeww kayy innit? bwahaha. well minus the weather.

so before long, prodigy took the stage. well i was expecting it to be like your average international dj visit thingie. but it was a live set which meant, prodigy performed using instruments like drums, effects, guitars and awesomely wicked pure vocals. thus the crowd didnt dance, but moreless moshed themselves. yea it was something like a rock concert like krystal said.

maybe it putoff a few people. but for me, they were awesome. people were jumpin and fuck. seriously i'm lost for words. simply fucking wicked. the sad part was that they only performed for an hour and let the local dj's take over. ie, goldfish and t-bone. pfft. crappy local dj's.

the crowd was sooo hyped up by prodigy, the sad sad set played by goldfish and tbone totally put everyone off. imagine, from jumping and jumping to a sudden stop and scratching heads? well i guess thats what happens when you change genre's from a hard evil breakbeat to hiphop? wattahell.

well. me and the lads walked around and just didnt feel like dancing to hiphop. main factor would be the lack of females. pfft. would you grind a dude? defineat no no. heh. so we walked and dance a bit. then it started to drizzle. heh. still feeling the urge to dance, but not to hiphop. we waited for the set to change. it rained heavier, thus utterly screwed the plans o waiting. made a few phone calls and we were off to espanda.

being at the top of kl tower and going back to our car which was parked at pan global(outside kl tower) with the rain upon us didnt help much. we ran down while dancing. picture running while our hands were doing liquid moves and danced. monkeys man. heh.

we reached the car soaking wet. but that still didnt stop us from heading down to espanda. heh. insane clubbers ya might say. ;D

well, espanda wasnt any better. it was empty but we got free drinks and danced to benny benassi's satisfaction. dj acid was spinning. his set was pretty good. first time me being in espanda. their interior was not bad. dont mind coming back there again. perhaps next time. ;)

left at 3am from espanda to jelutong for dinner. home to sleep.

-

sunday at sepang..

to be continued.

tireddd.

this is gonna be a slow post. not used to waking up early, thus i need time to recollect my thoughts. yesterday was a long long day for me. aih. today? well it aint gonna be any better. will be busy by afternoon till tomorrow morning. shite.

shoppin.

the lads and i went shopping yesterday, well actually they went shopping and i was there just to give comments and also act like a fashion consultant. like wattahell do i know abt style man. nevertheless, i think i did quite good at picking stuff. heh. it aint easy for dudes to pick things out for other dudes man. especially when they themselves dont exactly know what their looking for.

ironically thought, this happened to me like a couple o times already. the moment you actually have money and want to buy something. somehow you just cant find that right one. thus by the end o the day, most probably you'd end up with just 1 bag with 1 shirt? bah. seriously, how do you girls shop like tons o clothes. my cousin had rm300 to spend. which he ended up using only like rm130? on a t-shirt, shorts and boxers? yep. sad.

from KL to the curve. my other friend bought shades. heh, i picked em out and his pretty happy about it. we're calling him Mr. Emporium now, for wearing emporium armani shades. its not that expensive like i thought it would be. designer shades and stuff. we were teasing if they had like monthly payments for those really fucking high priced shades, which they actually do have. we were considering the shades, but then again. were not gonna bloody wear celine deon's shades! hahaha!

had to rush home after that because i had a dinner with me parents plus guests from america..

the dinner.

dinner was at royal lake club. dad dropped me and mom off there first while he went and pick up 'jim something with steven(his son)' from marriott hotel. expecting the homebound traffic to be packed and crawling, i had too much time to kill. which ended up with me walking about the club looking for anything interesting.

royal lake club isnt like your ordinary club. its ancient and located at the outskirts kl city. so it doesnt have a golf course but it does have the other facilities like badminton, tennis, squash court etc etc. the tennis court was located just next to the lounge, so i strolled by it to kill time. i never fancied tennis before, to be frank the only thing which fancies me in tennis would be maria sharapova fullstop. so as i watched an old couple playing it, i noticed something else at the next court.

well i'll be damnned. a malaysian maria sharapova. haha. nah. there was this girl in a skirt and sleeveless and she looked mighty fine with that rack-et. i mean em tennis balls. eh, ah forget it. i think she's mix judging by the old bald chinese guy (dad) behind her and white lady (mom) on the opposing side. weeee. 20 minutes breezed by as i watched each serve and backhands. ghahaa. suff the stalker. hey for a moment there i was thinking of taking up tennis, added that my instructor was as hawtt as her and all female tennis players were like her. ghahah.

my dad told us that he'd be late, so we went in to order the food first. its been ages since i last ate a chinese dinner. last time was with ermm.. and her mom cooked for me .. er.. forget it. finally after another 20 minutes my dad stepped in the restaurant accompanied by a tall bald white dude(jim) and his son(steven) which resembled somewhat a younger version of john mayer?

dig in! i said to steven. i offered him fork and spoons which he declined noting that he knows how to use chopsticks. which later i found it rather amusing, he knows how to use chopsticks but he just wasnt an expert at it. jim was a really friendly dude. something about me is that i really enjoy being in company of foreigners. its either their accent or how they express themselves which really entrigues me. being the all american, jim was really an enjoyful chap to be with. steven was a wee on the tired side not to mention overwhelmly shy.

steven's actually only 16, still studying in junior highschool which is equivalent to our form 4 with a year to go. i was practically shrieking inside when he said he has a sister which is 19. i wanted to ask why they didnt bring her along. not wanting to give off a bad pervert first impression, i kept it to myself.

on the way back, steven sat next to me at the back. before the engine even started he put on his seat belt. being the evil me, i teased him that in malaysia. the passengers at the back needn't wear seatbelts. he stared back at me taking note of the fact. half way to marriott hotel, stuck in jalan sultan ismail's traffic. i explained that we're at the heart of night KL. left and right were clubs and pubs all over. i noted that the amount of foreigners around, they all came here because of F1? damnn... they should have f1 more often!

while cruising past nouvo and espanda, steven asked me. 'do you guys have skylines here?' so being the slight car enthusist that i am too. explained abt which sports car we have here and yes we do have skylines. 'actually, if wait on this road a wee bit longer. you'd see all types of sports car' i told him. suddenly, 4 ferrari's zoomed past our car in a straight line. 3 reds and 1 black. 'oh hey look ferrari's!' i said. steven smiled. '

four fucking ferrari's at the same time racing. watta fuck! i've lived here for almost 20 years. first time seeing 4 of em 1 shot. lucky fucking steven!

anyways. we had pictures taken and was on our way home. before reaching that sime darby junction, i laughed my head off as i saw 1 ferrari broke down by the side of the road. i cursed by dad for not stoping as i wanted to take pictures. hwahaha.

the tickets.

reaching home. the next plan was to grab tickets for prodigy. but sadly because of a stupid cousin of mine whom was just soo cheap. i went down to buy the tickets with another friend which by then, the booth was fucking closed. pissed off and fucked tired. i went home. my cousin later said, since we havent bought tickets. he might not be joining me.

FUCKER!

-

uk edu fair now. female futsol tourney later. PRO-fucking-DIGY tonight. adios suckers!

scream for the weekend

my mom came barging into my room at 10 am in the morning. not that she's unwelcomed in my room. but the fact that she started the whole conversation while screaming at me didnt help much. shocked, confused and just too bloody sleepy led me to just cover my ears with my pillow and continued sleeping.

seriously, what a bad way to start a day with someone screaming at you. all pissed and ignoring her. i woke up late and canceled my plans for half the day. arghhh!

later my dad came home and explained why my mom made such ruckus in the wee hours of the morning. like wtf, giving me instructions at 7am when i slept at 5 and seriously expecting me to remember it. sheesh! wattahell!

so anyways. fixed the car later in the afternoon then i had a drink with a few lads. heh. fuckers just received their pay. 2k man. bastards! for the amount of effort they put in, its soo totally fucking unfair. oh well, free drinks for me. nyeh nyeh.

because i didnt ate anything since i woke up, i was craving for dinner. so happens that a friend o mine's sister is getting engaged. which meant free food! YIPPIE~!

-the engagement

to be frank, i know shit about malay engagement ceremonies. why? because i have better things to do than fucking go to see 2 people i know absolutely nothing about getting engaged. so pretty much tonight was my first time. me sqweels like a virgin. eek! eheehe.

rang up a friend to enquire abt the proposed dresscode, afraid that i'll fuck maybe some shitty tradition just because of the wrong colors o something. he told me to dress simple but with trousers at least. so off i go wearing a v neck shirt , jeans + cortez. pfft. im only here for the food. mmmm. dinneeerr.

the engagement took place at my friends condo 'crimson' near the lrt depot. the apartment is pretty high tech in terms of security but totally bollocks in parking. roads are thinner an ah-lians too boot. we thought we were dead late, ironically we were even early in fact. heh. taking seats on the floor while awaiting the guests, we made lame jokes and deceived a few kids. muahaha. we defineatly evil evil adults ere.

later when the guest arrived. the ceremony was about start, expecting to be brushed off anytime soon from the main circle, we just sat that staring blankly at the gifts brought by the guests. suddenly the bride's father started the ceremony. with us still in our seats.

feeling a wee bit stupid because, duh were not even fucking family, shit we came here for the food, pls dont ask me to say prayers cause i knew non. thank the heavens we didnt have to say any prayers aloud. i'd be gigling away to myself even if i was saying em.

after about 20 minutes, finally. the ceremony was done. their bloody engaged. which means, BRING ON THE FOOD!

*burp*

fuck, the food was just totally marvelous. but due to lack of seats and space we had to sit outside where its bloody fucking hot. arghh, wet armpits aint a good sight. weird thing was, my friends brother used to be an air steward. thus some of his friends came for the ceremony. sadly to say, most of the stewards were a wee bit 'soft'. i wont be suprised if their gay either.

one of em had a huge resemblance to cristiano ronaldo. minus the buff, tan, dyed hair, oh not to mention manlyness. fucking fag. blah.

-

went to my friends office to pick up some stuff, ate some icecream at mc donalds. its only 1am suddenly my dad calls..

dad: come home.
me: er.. why? whats wrong?
dad: nothings wrong, just come home.
me: ya okay. later. not sure when.. bye!

wattahell? oh watever man. so i came back home to change cars and bath. then after an hour of pacing around my room. i called up the lads to pick me up.

-

full tank in the car always meant drivearounds. being the lifeless idiots we are. we decided to drive around kl at 4am, in hopes for single chicks to be around. duh, rationality was correct as there were non at sight at all. so we dropped by hartamas to have a drink.

while sippin on that hot teh-o, i was truly impressed with the other crowds dressing. its soo obvious that they've just finished clubbing and bummed hear till they drop. some were wannabe ghetto gangsta's while others were usher and alicia keys. your typical crowd of zouk on thursday's ghetto heaven night.

pfft. hip hop is swaying. beeyoootch!

while my friend retold his tragic love story of the past. fucker's serious romantic man. i thought i was a sappy romantic, 4-0 to him compared to me. we left home feeling sappy and full of nonsense frm the night.

-

tomorrow we'll be going down to kl for shoppinnnn.. and also to breakers later at night to get em F1 party tickets. i'll also be having dinner with my dad and some american. heh, will be rehearsing that accent tomorrow. bwahhaha. lame o me.

anyways. off to bed. its already 6.22am. laters

habit. love

1.00 am.

*stomach grumbling*

sigh, this is what happens when you eat dinner too early. with abso-fucking-lutely nothing to watch on the tele. life suddenly became extremely depressing. its a bloody weekday and its only 1am. what the bloody hell to do...

after a good 20 minutes deciding. final decisions were to fill thy stomach and being a malaysian i am. eating late late suppers is just too normal. heh. so in i went to the kitchen to see whats there to eat. cabinets were raided, the fridge was infilterated. theres lotsa food, but their all.. raw.

pfft. figures.

so, the options were;

tuna ... or tuna..

tuna it is.. hrm. tuna sandwich..

'toasted or not toasted? .. that is the question...'

being the greedy person i am, decided on toasted because the thought of cheese simply made my stomach jump with joy. as i mixed the vegies with the tuna, i suddenly realized that i just made portion for two.

'oh welll .. more for me!'.

so at 2am. i was chomping down on 4 mouth savouring toasted tuna sandwich with extra cheese.

i am soo gonna be flabby from this. oh well!

-

lovey dovey looourveee...

we've all had a taste of it. some bitter some sweet. mostly sexual bwahaha. okay maybe not. but hey, its what makes life feel so damn wonderful at times. we're humans, were suppose to be with that special someone at the end of the dayy...

so we look, crave and long for that special someone to finally be in our lives. that they stay there forever and ever.. and never leave us for it will make us weak and die a sad sad lonely death. even though we know what may come might not be as colorful as it seems. because life is about balance. what good that comes will bring bad.

'but love will make everything alrite' says a man who's love for another women was so deep he would cross ocean's of fire if they existed.

pfft oceans of fire. if they existed you wouldnt be in love with her. your be so deep in your prayers, a girl dancing topless while riding on a donkey wouldnt disturb you.

'oy this lad is a pessimist on lourve, he must have been dumped. watta loser' ya might say. well alrite, i'll admit that i am a smuck when it came to lourve. but even as biased i am towards love, the need for a companion for those long cold lonely night has never left my thought. quoted from a movie, 'love is about patience'.

thus i shant look for love if love shant look for me.

besides. why rush things ey?

love is annoying yet beautiful at the same time. love is fucked up yet rational too. in easy terms, love is like gambling.

aih, but like gambling too. what happens when you go overboard. lack of love leads to feeling unattended and unsatisfied. leads too much love causes pain and anguish to those who share not the same feeling. but who are we to actually stop love from growing, its a natural element which grows and shrinks constantly.

'love unreturned is nothing more than an obsession'

a plague? a mishap? or just plain stubborn. obsessed over your own significant other. worst, over other people's significant other. it starts with insecurity, which then leads to distrust ..

easy said. obsessive people are just fucked up in th head.

*maid enteres the room informing something very important

*me rushes out to on the tele. see's the hostess of wanita hari ini.

suff: oh baby, i'm sooo inlove wit joooo.. i wanna marry youuuuu... baby pleaseee... i'm beggin youuuu.. though i dont know anything about youuuu.. but i need youuuuu.. i wannt youuu .. oh baby.. oh baby.. you make me horney.. come make me your daddyy.. while i stuff you with my @*#*! .. and eat your !@###!

*comes back to reality.

yea. so obessive people are soo fucked in the head. fucking stalkers. horny bastards.

=P

-

i already got myself a girl to love. a pretty baby girl whom i love so extremely much. days seem so dull without her and watching her sleep soundly in the night defineatly makes me feel that i already have everything i need.

love you always.




isabella

beads

because i live a sad sad and pathetic life which revolves around un-happening things like partaeying and getting drunked nor getting laid. i had to resolve to find something which for a tiny moment, would crack myself up. heck even crack my friends up.

thus includes, self embarresment and what not.

so, on one evening filled with nothing but the word 'BORED outta my MIND'. i decided to have a quick snap with the camera. with the theme ' MANHUNT '.the outcome was more than i expected. before long i had lots and lots o wonderful comments. their sooo colorful, i could paint a rainbow with it.

i'll start with the best to the worst.

'wow. model pose'
'whats up with the beads?'
'tank top?!'
'EEEEWWWW!!'
'wtf suff!'
'oh my fucking godd'
'gay'
'fucking faggg'
'ass rapist'
'no wonder my g-string went missing'
'stay away from me you fag'
'gayhunt'
'belakang mari'

yep. i got the whole works. which means, my proposed objective worked. cause thou the comments were abit blunt, some were fucking hilarious. thus, me laughing like a jackass in the early hours of 11.30am. yep thats fucking early to me.

anyways. that picture will stay there for a while. cause it makes me feel man. KAKAKAKAK
nah, till i actually get a proper decent nerdish pic to replace it.

-

well. half way through being the laughing stock of the town. my mom had to drag me out as her driver while she pays the bills. upon reaching the bank, she went in while i stayed in the car...

15 minutes later.

mother fucking god of all things cold and freezing, this weather is killing meee. earlier on i watched channel 11. travel & discovery and they were showing some cook show abt food in china.

chicken = wrapped in clay = into oven = good food.

me = in car = hot bloody fukcing sun = pissed off sweaty suff.

gees. the weather is such a killer these days. were talking 38 bloody celcius ere man. oy, what a killer. while the people on the other side of the planet wants more sun, i'm sure malaysians would gladly give some of ours.

anyway, me being the designated driver continued for a few more hours.

i just simple dont get it with KL traffic. not only are the driver's fucking twatheads, the traffic lights are just plain bollocks. a 10 bloody second green with a 2 minute red. whats the ratio for that man. morons i tell ya, morons!

finally upon making that u-turn which took 30 minutes. happily this caucasian female was crossing the road while on her hp. now, i know that in america. the drivers are more than courteous. but here in malaysia. if you dont fucking hurry up. your gonna get killed beeyootch! lucky she had a nice ass thus, no honking. ;) wouldnt o mind tapping that ass with my front bumper though.

bleh. had a glorious lunch at chilli's. as usuall, my favorite : ground peppercorn burger with mash potato, nacho's and mango juice.

i was a king for 30 minutes. till my stomach bloats which led to me feeling like a pregnant woman.

no fucking dinner please.

gotta plan on what to do tomorrow. given up on being a model/gay. later wanks.

beat

its quite amazing looking back now, at how drastic the clubbing scene in malaysia has grown. what used to be the 'golden triangle' of kl, has now changed many times. even bars are now accustombed to have at least a small dance floor for patrons to dance all night. from bangsars irish pub to centre kl zouk itself. as weekends near, these places are jam packed and filled with people who just wanna party and have a good time. nothing wrong after a week of stress and work.

its a jungle out there, especially on weekends. tall,dark,thin or simply fugly. it doesnt matter, what matters is that its friday night and that means, party. parties which officially starts at midnight and ends early in the morning. by early morning, vomits and overdosed drunkards can be seen outside of clubs or pubs. so what is it actually that enticed these people to repeat the same routine weekend after weekend?

sex, drugs and alcohol? true that these elements are the actual reason for parties like such to actually be so 'alive'. but then again, there are those who dont drink, dont take drugs but try their lucks in getting laid. heh. if you were to ask them, 'why do you come here each weekend?' their simple answer would be, 'the music and to dance'.

so does music belong under the same category as 'sex,drugs and alcohol'? it entices us with its influence, which overtime makes us lose ourselves. ecstatic we become and dance all night to the beat. 'well atleast its legal' people would say. with that thought in mind, we move our body in motion synchronized with the tempo of the bass.

-

looking back past years, i could still remember the days where people just simple danced their on way and were given sincere compliments that their natural dancers. the days where 'melbourne shuffle' was a dance which only hardcore clubbers knew. at that time, 'shufflers' hanged out amongst their cliques in designated sections of the dance floor. not because of discrimination but due to the fact that they need bigger space to 'shuffle'. now you go to any clubbing event other than hiphop, you'd be amazed at the number of people 'shuffling'.

has the 'melbourne shuffle' taken over the dance scene's in malaysia?

i cant say. but the obvious fact that almost all the average joe clubber will actually download video's on 'how to melbourne shuffle', if not least seen the video once. then perhaps melbourne shuffle did took over the dance scene in malaysia over the years. now we see shuffling competition going on, guest shufflers from oz to shuffle on podiums during events. dressed like a shuffler, with loose pants and glowsticks.

has this become the uniform for a clubber?

yes, shuffling is quite a thing, the leg movements are truely 'twisting'. but what happens when everyone shuffles. has it become a trend amongst clubbers? or has it become a necessity?

if your a clubber, then you gotta know how to shuffle.

thus, without knowing. discrimination has slowly seep into the dancing arena. those who dont know how to shuffle will be looked upon as 'not clubbers'. which overtime will slowly embrace the melbourne shuffle, just because everyone is doing it. i wouldnt be suprised if suddenly designated club spots in KL turned into a 'shuffler's club'.

to me, to be a true clubber. you gotta know how to dance to all the genre's of clubbing music. which includes hiphop, though guys dont actually dance in hiphop. they simply sway to the music, nontheless.

-

Pit Party feat PRODIGY @ KL - tower. 19032005
HERE I COME !

1 more

i hate exams.

exams = stress + bullshit.

but then again,

results = uni = work = money = impreza.

so,

me + study + stress = exam;

exam = result;

result = impreza;

hence, me = impreza.

-

i'm stressed. gah!

dont you just hate it, when you think you've covered more than enough then suddenly when you opened that exam paper. the first question makes you feel so stupid that you can actually see that 'distinction slowly flying away from you'

come back distinction ... come backkk~!

arghhhh!!

-

on a fun note, tomorrow will be my last paper. which means ... PARTAEEEE~!

i got only a measly week of holiday but i guess its more than enough considering i get bored pretty easily. oy gotta think things through for the holidays man. being the conservative twat that i am, i might even make a schedule of what to do for the holiday. thus, saving cash while maximizing fun fun fun!

weekdays i guess i'd be bored, shit. aiee...

starting from friday however, things would be on a roll.

Friday :Tsunami Concert - Boys2men yada yada yada.(RM82-CHEAPEST!)
Saturday : F1 Qualifying(RM50-Student) , UK education Fair(Free la), Regenerate(? RM...), few more shits.
Sunday : F1 Race Day.

though doesnt actually look much but aieee, these events take up time. not to mention money. this is the part where i wish i was a millionaire. bleh.

-

ooh. i jog everyday now. 3 rounds campus. weee. dont even get me started on the fame i got suddenly for running around campus all sweaty and wearing sexy shorts..

shall talk more later. right now i'm feeling hungry.

ecstacy

1.17pm.
'fuck!' you say to yourself. you sit by the edge of your bed while you recollect
your thoughts. unable to recall yesterdays events, you place your head on
your hands and think..

'what the fuck did i do last night' you mumble. suddenly feeling dizzy. you
look around you trying to make out what might of happened last night.
topless. jeans. smelling like smoke. not to mention the bad odour of a long
night.slowly, part by part, figments of yesterday comes back to you.
'gees, yesterday was whacked.. i guess its been that long since the last time i
partied till dawn'

yeap. your body aches, you stink badly and you noticed your missing some
load o cash. yesterday was indeed some awesome shit. then suddenly you
realized something. you rush off to bath and call up a few friends for drinks
and perhaps lunch.

-

fresh,renewed and rejoiced after that long bath. finally the smoke smell is
gone. while you sip your drink slowly awaiting your friends.

few minutes later..

you: fuck man. yesterday was totally wickedly insaneeee. gees.
joe: fucker if i'd knew your that good i'd fucking ask for lesson's man.
you: pfft. me? you should o seen timmy ere doin his shit, the laydies were all
ovahh man..alll ovahhhhh!
timmy: bugger off you wanks. i'm only here for lunch.
you: heh. hey man, the shit's just beginning.. tonights the real guacamoley!
joe: hell fucking yea man, tonight its gonna be massive. shit dude. i cant wait
timmy: not sure about going man, my arsed gf's making pissy excuses.
you: oh just force her to come man, tell her i'll pay for your condoms. you
guys can fuck all night if u guys want. just come.
joe: i'll bring the camera.
timmy: wtf? okay okay. i'll ask her to come but joe, u bring that camera and
i'll fucking shove it up ur ass.
joe: not for you, you fucktard. for the laydiees!
you: so its confirmed then, we leave at 9. laters man.
timmy: a wee bit early to be buying condoms isnt it?
joe: oy, while ur there, get me a few.
you: pfft. preparations my friend.

-

9.08pm.
on the phone..
you: where the bloody fuck are you? stop fucking with ur gf and pick us up already!
timmy: shut the fuck up man, gimme 5 minutes. wheres joe? he there yet?
you: like fuck yea, he's gettin on my nerve with his crappy moves man. hurry up will ya!

-

you step into the car feeling anxious. the absolute fact that tonight theres
gonna be hundreds perhaps even thousands of people there makes it even
worst. 'its gonne be packed' you whisper to yourself. but the more people the
merrier.

corner after corner. 'gees. couldnt they made the road any more winding?'
you say. insignificant fact. tonights gonna be huge. finally reaching the place,
suddenly a feeling of deja vu hits you. this place has brought some sweet
memories. parked the car, now time to check in.

the person at the counter couldnt of been a bigger arse than he already is.
'fucking retard' you let out. you put your things in the room and slowly went
downstairs for a 'welcome back' drink.

as you step into the lobby, your eyes were awed at the number of people
around. its only 10 and already theres so many bloody people around. pfft.
newbies. the main point was, DAMN THERES SO MANY LAYDIES AROUND!
'its defineatly gonna be a good night' you tell yourself again.

-

before long, you slowly move towards the designated areas. as you reach the
counter. you gave the ticket to the lovely counter girl, the bouncer gave a
quick glance at you, nodded and let you in.

reminiscence of younger days where you had to sneak into places like this
made you laugh. slowly moving towards the rooms. the bass fills your feet,
thump! thump! you look around looking for familliar faces. 'Mel!' you yell out.

in the midst of the crowd, a head turns. blonde and red streaks, long haired,
j-lo kind of glasses, choker, baby-blue spaghetti strap, denim mini skirt and
pink nike cortez.

mel: omgg! its youuuu! how've ya beeenn omg. gimme a hug!
you: *goes all giddy* omg omg omg ohh myy gaawwdd! i'm fine. oh yes
please!
mel: you look good. dressed to kill i presume?
you: only for you babes. pfft me. look at yourself. dont you feel nippy? we're

quite high up in altitude here.mel: aww. shit really? is my nips showing?
you: heh nawh. you look hawt girl. when are ya gonna be my bitch?
mel: when you can afford an impreza.
you: soon! hey anyways. i'll see you aroundz. perhaps even grind that ass of
yours later.
mel: grind away if u see me.

at last you move towards joe and timmy, who've been waiting for you for
ages. you give them a naughy smirk and moved together deeper into the
crowd.

left and right you observe the crowd, massive. tall or short it didnt matter here. people were dancing all over, as your feet slowly followed. synchronizing to the beat. suddenly there crowd uproared. as you notice movements at the dj booth. 'switch of dj? whos that?' you question. as the
new dj slowly sets up his vinyls. the current dj ends his climax and lowers down the tempo.

as the current dj waves his hand in appreciation of the crowd, the new dj steps up. the crowd awaits the new revolution. then by storm, the beat suddenly changed. the crowd screamed as the new beat empowered their feet new life. you look around you to see timmy already dancing madly with his gf, joe doing something which looks like a tribal dance. Boom! your feet
suddenly came to life, as if it moved by its own.

up tempo, your body suddenly fills with adrenaline. yesterday's so called fatigue seemed to disappear. as you dance and danced. the people around you smile in acknowledgement of your moves. as you smile to yourself watching joe making a fool out of himself, you showed him the thumb telling him not to stop.

2 straight hours you danced, finally you stopped to grab some air and water. you ask joe to accompany you but he nudges you off as he continued dancing with a female stranger.

'ditch me for a bitch, watta friend. bah.' you grumbled.

slowly you moved towards the refreshment area. reaching there, you tell the bartender what drink you want. suddenly something catches your eye. a face smiled at you from across the counter. a lady. the bartender hands her drink to her, she slowly walks off smiling at you. confused but being the hormonally charged male you are. you grabbed your drink and started to follow her. she moved quickly towards the centre of the crowd, but you followed easily.

brown haired, blonde streaks. j-lo glasses, white top.

finally you stood beside her. feeling a bit confused on what to do next. she smiled, amused by your confused state. you slowly started dancing again. this time, with her infront of you. at first her back was facing you, slowly she turned and faced you. still unsure of what to do you just continued dancing. till she suddenly moved closer to you. 'your cute' she said giving out a sexy smile. simple enough with those two words. before long you were dancing with her.

minutes after minutes. suddenly, unintentionally your face moved forward nearing hers. she looked up, knowing what was going to happen next. her crimson lips shine as you moved closer and closer for it.

half an inch left...

-
mom: SUFF! COME AND EAT YOUR LUNCH NOW!
suff: okay mom..

bah. i'm stuck at home and i gotta study.

waaaaaa... i wanna go zoukfest! waaaaaaaaaa.....

somebody kill meee....

weekends near!

oih buggers. the weekends near.

alas. i got fucking mid terms so all plans are basically fucking scrapped. hence a weekend of pure boredom and studying?

pfah. shant talk about college cause i got another whole week to suffer here in vain.

to be frank, i feel old lately and i can assure you that i havent been myself lately. heck i think its been a while actually. i'm not sure what the bloody hell is the problem. nevertheless, i hope the passing of this phase will come soon.

okay, i actually have nothing to write about. seriously i'm outta idea's on what to write.

come on, you guys wouldnt wanna read about my daily antics everyday forever right? shit even the fact that my life aint that bloody interesting everyday makes it even worst. seriously, i'm a sloowww phase in mylife.

yep. the sad sad life i live in.

moving onn..

have you guys ever went into an online forum? i've been into a few and somehow, i dont know.. is it a norm to be flaming others ? or post a suggestion in such a mocking way, yet expect positive results? heh.

the forums i went in are for the general public but i'd expected.. i dunno a wee more matured responce? the forums are definelty for adults too.

*bah. gtg now. friends calling me..

its been a long week. i'll write better shits on my laptop and later flood you guys with good articles next week or sumthing alrite. till then. byebye!

TEH TARIK SATUUUUU~!

satisfaction

stress.

that word is what you learn when your in college. i relish the days when the only matters which mattered was just going to school and homework. if i were to see how i deal with work now when i was still 17, i'd rub my eyes and pinch myself till i bleed.

previous years, staying up late were either just because;

• exam's tomorrow.
• flirtin on the phone.
• online online online.

well it hasnt exactly changed, but now staying up late has become a lifestyle. eyebags as a fashion statement and eating disorder are just timing.

today i had a presentation for my final project.

so basically you could just imagine me a few hours back, still up. stressed. looking down at me laptop, trying to figure out how the bloody fuck flash worked. memorizing informations, checking slides.. the whole works.

is this what you call 'college life'?

well i guess it might be. though i like college while i despised school.

ironic isnt it?

-

overall, all my preparation for my presentation paid off.

everything was smooth sailing. heck, the examiners only asked 1 question cause he didnt know what to ask. every aspect of the project was included in the slide already. though i gotta say that if i had an extra day or two to do the animations, it'll look sooo much better.

heh. who cares, less burden fo me! yippieee

presentation grades: 9/10. Distinction.

-

now i gotta find sponsors for my other work, study for my midterms next week and also research further for assignments.

long-long day ahead.

cant wait for june.

laters man!